IT IS WELL

First and foremost.... 2 Kings 4:26 Is it well with thee? is it well with thy husband? is it well with the child? And she answered, It is well:

This Scripture has become my heart-cry. No matter what may come in life, through Christ alone, IT IS WELL.

Last night's prayer meeting was SO awesome and SO timely! We need to learn to wait on God, because when things happen in HIS time, they are always so beautiful and perfect. The Lord has spoken "Selah" into our hearts - issuing healing and restoration to many. This is a time of peace, relaxation, as we listen to the music "we've" created resound off the walls and slowly fade away. Don't rush it! It's so beautiful what God has done. Healing balm of Gilead has been spread throughout hearts and lives and it's such a beautiful thing.

I have been so pressed and worried from all sides - the message Sunday morning AND Sunday night were totally awesome. The Lord's train fills the temple - His accomplishments. We need to let our Uzziah die (self-will and flesh) and let the LORD become out Life-Coach [Isaiah 6]. We need to make HIM our center of attention. Christ states that we are the Apple of His eye, we need to make Him the apple of OUR eyes. We need to focus on him and walk DAILY in the Emmanuel. I want to live in my Emmanuel. My Provider. There is nothing in this world that I can ever NEED that the Lord will not provide - In HIS TIME.

Thank you Lord, Thank you so so so much for your words. I want to desire your words as much as I desire to take my next breath. Put that longing in me.

I am walking in you, Lord, My Emmanuel. My provider - and in YOUR time, you will move my mountains and foothills... in the meantime, thank you for Speaking SELAH to the storms that surround them.

Mountain Mover

My God is a mountain mover - My God’s gonna make a way - Can’t count all the time He’s proven - We can trust him just have faith - Take a hopeless situation - Watch Him turn it all around - Nothing is impossible - I can’t hold back I’ve gotta shout - My God, My God My God - Is a mountain mover - Got a problem in my pathway - I feel I’m frozen here - Doubts are circling high above me - But in the shadow of my fear - The Fire of faith is stirring - Growing inside of me - Reminding me of something - I already believe - He’s a God of mighty miracles - When the days are dark - I will keep on trusting Him - I will not lose heart -

Here goes....

So it goes like this... I have one of the most wonderful joys of being a mother. My beautiful soon to be 5-yr-old is truly one of the bright rays of sunshine in my life. Naomi was born December 3, 2004 and I had the opportunity to stay at home with her until January 6th, 2005 - those weeks seemed to fly by. Our financial status screamed that I needed to go back to work, and of course, the office "needed" me - I'd been out a month and had recovered nicely from the C-Section... So Naomi was now in the hands of her more-than-capable daddy. From January to May he was attending PRC, so when he was in class, Naomi spent time at Nana's... occasionally they visited Gramma, they had a blast. I missed her incessantly. I even brought her to work a few days when I didn't have a sitter, but that wasn't very often. After Joseph Graduated, he began working with his uncle. Naomi was back and forth between Nana's and Gramma's non-stop. I know her grandparents loved this time with her, but it was killing me that I wasn't home to be with her. I pushed the longing aside... I kept moving forward... In December 2006 I gave my (2) weeks notice before getting out for Christmas and had about 3 weeks at home before starting a new Job on January 4th, 2007. Naomi was now with my mom almost 5-days a week. She'd occasionally stay at her Nana's when my mom was unavailable... Candice babysat, Tiffany kept her on her days off... Misty even kept her. Back and forth, back and forth... The Spring of 2008 my mom needed a break, so for about 5 or 6 months she was with her Nana. School was getting close, and Naomi was 3, I began looking at our options of schools and daycare, Ms. Cindy had plans on going back to work... Joseph and I enrolled her, she began school. At 3. She hated it, she loved it. She was never sure of what she thought in the mornings. We fought getting dressed and she cried when I dropped her off. About a month into it, she finally calmed down, although she had an occasional relapse of the "i dont wanna go blues". She made it through the school year, turned 4 in December of 2008, did wonderful at the end-of-the-year Program K-5 Graduation.... She learned so much attending there. Without any other firm options, we kept her in the summer program. She had about 4 weeks of "breaks" - one week they were closed for 4th of July, she went to LA with my mom... one week I asked my sister in law to keep her... the next week we went to Branson and the next week my mom wanted to bring her back to LA... And now she's into the last 3 weeks of Summer School... she'll have 1 week off and the 2009-2010 school year begins August 31st. My precious little 4 year old, for the past year has been attending school from 8am to 5pm every day. Every morning is a battle, getting her up and dressed and out the door... I just don't think it's "fair" when she already has 12 years of education ahead of her, here I am adding another 2 because I can't take the time to actually be a mother and stay at home with her. I want to be home, not having to worry about getting her up at 630/7 every morning, rushing her cause we're running late, getting her to school at 830/845 and me myself being 30-45 minutes late for work everyday because of the battles we've had to fight... my socks feel funny, I hate these shoes, this skort bothers me, I don't want to wear this, I have a wedgie, I don't want my hair fixed, I don't feel like brushing my teeth......! When our second child gets here in December I will be on Maternity Leave for at least 12 weeks. I believe I am going to let Naomi stay at home with me... Might as well learn how to juggle the two right from the get-go, right? Plus, I want to have the bonding time, bonding with both my daughter and son. I feel like Naomi's been slighted. I've been a mother, but I feel like I've failed at being Mommy the first 5 years of her life. I just can't see putting my new baby in any childcare facility. Not a new born.... not a 2 month old. Doing so, I feel would only double the hardships - paying two childcare fees? Naomi's is already between 300 and 350 a month... and a Newborn wouldn't be less than 90 a week... that's another 350-375... I mean, it makes no sense... I feel like the Lord would desire me to be more active in raising my kids - I thank the Lord for a mother and mother-in-law who was Naomi's primary caregiver 8-9 hours a day the first 3 years of her life. I don't want a childcare or daycare facility teaching my children the things I should be... I am ashamed that Naomi has learned more about God at her school than I've ever been able to instill in her between the hours of 5pm and 8am plus the weekends. I mean, at least 7-8 of those 15 hours she's sleeping, and the other 2 are spent 1/2 asleep getting ready for school and on the drive to and from school. She's at school from 8 in the morning til usually 5 in the evening... to me that's just about like sending a 4 yr old to work. Its horrible and it breaks my heart. It's like I've pawned her off on someone else because I haven't taken the time to raise her myself. It hurts my heart and I'm reeeeeeeeally tired of it. I can't imagine doing the same thing to another one of my children. I want to be a mommy. Not just a mother. I'm ready to come home. I know the Lord understands my heart cry, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I trust in Him - He has blessed me and my husband up to this point, and I whole-heartedly believe it is just a beginning. I'm ready, Lord, for you to move mountains. I claim it as my promise, Lord, and I will praise you in advance.

BABY BOOM!!!!

Okay... so here's the Baby Boom line-up!!
June 23rd 2009 Jennifer delivered her 2nd beautiful daughter, Lydia Nichell, 7lbs. 6 oz., 20 inches long. Congratulations, Jennifer and Scott Cuaves on such a beautiful little girl!
August 15th 2009 Amber Mabb Montgomery is due to deliver her firstborn, Ryan Christopher Montgomery, JR. Her Baby Shower @ WARC is Sunday August the 2nd at 4:00p
September 21st 2009 Kristi Scarborough is due to deliver her 3rd child... NATURALLY. *shudders* Some women got it, some don't. LOL
November 7th 2009 Vanessa Whittington & Scooter are due to deliver their 2nd child; A BOY!!!
December 18th 2009 is my due date to deliver our 2nd child; A BOY!!! Although my due date is the 18th, we will probably deliver between the 7th and the 11th via scheduled c-section. Next Appointment scheduled on August 28th.
January 9th 2010 is Ashley Michelle Dobbs Dudeck and Jonathan are due date to deliver their 1st AND 2nd! (It's TWINS!!) Although her due date is January 9th, being her first pregnancy AND carrying twins, her doctor is leaning more towards the 3rd or 4th week of December 2009.
January 26th 2010 Bethany McNease and Shea are due to deliver their second child! You can read their journey here: http://sheaandbethanymc.blogspot.com/
February 3rd 2010 s Julie Dobbs Plemons and Wade are due date to deliver their 1st child.
February (2nd week) 2010 Becca Neal Tharp will deliver her 1st child!
March 30th 2010 (Approximately) Tabatha Farve & Jeremy are expecting their second child! She hasn't had her initial ultrasound yet, but as soon as she gets a "sure" due date I will post that as well!! Just a little background on Tabatha and Jeremy.... they tried conceiving soon after marrying in 2000. It was discovered that Tabatha had cysts on her ovaries and they scheduled a surgery to remove them... the day she went in for surgery they found she was pregnant with her firstborn, Persephanie! After Persephanie was born, they rescheduled surgery... they eneded up having to remove an ovary, leaving Tabatha and Jeremy with 1/2 the chance of becoming pregnant again, as it is a little more difficult to do with just one ovary. :-) However, a few years later, Look what the Lord has done!!!
Who's to be next?? :-)

As we find out the sex of the babies' I will update this - and of course, as they are born, I will surely update it with weights and lengths.
Check out the latest ultrasound:

I'm Pregnant!

:-) Never underestimate the prayer of a 4yr old!!!! (-:

Current mood: stoked

Category: Life

So it goes like this:

Since January 31st I been feeling like it was high time we added to our family. I didnt express my thoughts verbally cause Joseph and I have discussed it and we both had mixed feelings on the topic....

People have constantly asked "aint it about time ya'll had another one?" I would brush it off, cause evidently if you arent preventing for 4 years and it aint happened yet it apparently isn't God's timing......

For the last 2 weeks I been sore in places I don't think I should have been... So I slowed waaaaaaaay down @ the gym, sticking to abs, eliptical and treadmill.....

Naomi asked me just this Sunday "Mom, can I ask God for a baby brother?"

I was like, whhhhhoooooaaaaa, He's about the only one you need to talk to about that. Ha.

Since Jan 31st I've been waiting.....nothing ever happened..... I went and got a ept and tested yesterday morning, getting a negative result.

I went to the doc today and they did a blood test.... getting a poitive result. Woot Woot!!!

So. The Moral of the story is.......

:-) Never underestimate the prayer of a 4yr old!!!! (-:

in prayer

lord, i need you i need you in my heart you seem so mysterious at times i am confused i must learn to trust and keep hold of your hand the questions come why, Lord, why? and then I must remember you know our comings and our goings the reasons are yours to know i cling to all i know trying desperately to place it all the tumultuous thoughts and emotions to be hurt or not to be hurt? offended, offensive...? my decision is to be defended using Christ alone as my defense my heart may be wounded words, actions, deeds be the swords tip yet i will not waver i will not fall i place my well-being in your hand fear, torment, worry have no place in my heart the guilt, the blame, the condemnation satan is angered though it may be thrown my way, i refuse to let it stay as the duck QUACK QUACK and it rolls off it's back so be the fiery darts of the enemy drowning, spiraling down in the current i feel i can't break through i reach, i grasp, hurriedly hoping its all a bad dream calm, peace, serenity.... words flying incomprehensible through my head the tornado grows, the winds blow.... the rain begins, hard, angry, huge drops flood my soul beating away the hurt, the pain then lightly now, slacking ever so slightly, a smooth wisping sprinkle like fresh dew on the rose I feel the gentle drops carrying away all that should be gone refreshing, cold the smell of spring showers i feel the life stirring deep within, my heart is healing not worried, but at peace surprised at the change the storm can bring i awake, i smile. i dance, i pause. You alone, Jesus, are my salvation. You bring me peace no man can bring. Your word is wise, your patience longsuffering. You do not condemn. You speak life. You bring all that is good into my life. Your grace, your mercy - Always steady and unchanging. Washed away, in the sea of forgetfulness, all my torment, my pain - I thank you, i praise you. You alone are worthy My Lord My Savior My Christ My King..... But most of all, MY FRIEND

Food For Thought

I was reading a christian novel last night, and in doing so, the Lord opened my eyes to something I have been too blind to see. I do not have the book with me, so I am very much so going to paraphrase here. I hope it gets the point across. In this novel, a man was trying to comfort a friend who was faced with some difficult decisions. He began to tell her of a story his father used many times in sermons in days gone by..... There was this older fisherman who found himself alone out on the rough seas as a storm began to settle in. His small fishing boat was soon capsized by the overbearing waves, and the fisherman thought he'd surely perish. Much to his amazement, the Lord had it be that his boat capsized near an old and rusty buoy. The fisherman gave every ounce of determination he could muster fighting the waves to grab a hold of the old rusty thing. He climbed up on the buoy and held fast, praying and thanking the Lord that he'd not drowned. As he clung to the buoy for dear life, tossed to and fro in the tumultuous waves, the old man prayed that the Lord would spare his life. Minutes seemed like hours, and it wasn't too terribly long that another small craft happened by the buoy carrying a younger fisherman. The second threw the old man a rope and begged him to take hold so he could pull him to safety and get him to land.... time and time again the younger fisherman threw out a lifeline, begging the old man to let go of the buoy and come to the safety of the boat. The old man, out of fear, clung fast to the rusted buoy... He refused to loosen his grip for fear he'd be tossed under and swallowed up by the sea. The younger fisherman, heart wrought with despair, had no choice but to head inland before his craft be taken by the sea, thus leaving the old man to die, cold and alone in the midst of the storm. How many times do we, as Christians, hold on tight to all that is before us, praying God 'spare our lives', and when he happens by to send a lifeline REFUSE TO LET GO of the rusted old buoy and be pulled to safety? Lord, please, teach me to not hold on to the things I would believe to be my safety and life. Let me always be open to YOUR WAY, for you alone know my life's needs. I don't want to drown in the sea of storms because I try to work my life out on my own terms. Lead my life, Lord, in every way. I desire whole-heartedly YOUR WILL be done, on earth as it is in Heaven. Thank you for your mercy and grace, Lord. I bless your name, Jesus. Amen.

Sight Past Your Horizon...

I received this quote today: God made the world round so we would never be able to see too far down the road. - Isak Dinesen Sometimes, we may become baffled at the fact that we don’t know what our tomorrow holds… or where each crossroad we face may lead. It is this simple fact alone that should propel us to seek after Christ’s face each and every morning. The scripture says in Proverbs 8:17 “I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me.”Today, if you are feeling a bit overwhelmed with the world that is swirling around you, your lack of vision past your horizon, or the stresses of past regrets, SEEK HIM. The “Theme” for Word Alive this year is “It’s time to Shine in Two-Thousand Nine”… and for the past few weeks I have had a song (Jesus Calling by 33Miles) in my head…T he lyrics are so fitting with what I have on my heart this morning. “What do you see when you look at your world today Is it so full of clutter that you feel like you’re going insane And you can’t fight back cause you’re just too afraid and it seems like the clouds in your sky don’t wanna change You see there’s always another story, another side to every coin, And how you see your circumstance is all about a choice When you see the rushing wind , feel the pouring rain, hear the thunder now as the clouds roll in and you’re blinded by the lightning, do you also hear that still, small voice saying It’s okay, you’re not alone, you may be scared to death, But I won’t let you go You may think the sky above is falling But can you hear Jesus calling What do you see when you look at your world today Do you see a glimmer of hope, or has it all turned to gray Well start by counting your blessings one by one Oh and I’m sure right there, you’ll start to see the sun You see there’s always another story, another side to every coin And how you see your circumstance is all about a choice When you see the rushing wind , feel the pouring rain, hear the thunder now as the clouds roll in and you’re blinded by the lightning, do you also hear that still, small voice saying It’s okay, you’re not alone, you may be scared to death, But I won’t let you go You may think the sky above is falling But can you hear Jesus calling Because the darker the night, the brighter He can shine When you see the rushing wind , feel the pouring rain, hear the thunder now as the clouds roll in and you’re blinded by the lightning, do you also hear that still, small voice saying It’s okay, you’re not alone, you may be scared to death, But I won’t let you go You may think the sky above is falling But can you hear Jesus calling…..” On top of it all, last night’s sermon was just awesome. Can you hear the cry of those unsaved around you? I do hope you realize its nigh to midnight – “The night cometh when no man can work.” John 9:4 The scripture tells us in Luke 17:24 “For as the lightning, that lighteneth out of the one part under heaven, shineth unto the other part under heaven; so shall also the Son of man be in his day.” Be that light. Be the Salt. The Darker the night, the Brighter we should shine. Have you accepted your “Go Ye”? (Matthew 28:19 “Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name [JESUS] of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost:”)SEEK HIM. Be a Light. Reach out to those around you. Be amazed at the sight God gives you to see just past your Horizon. Love. -Pam