in prayer

lord, i need you i need you in my heart you seem so mysterious at times i am confused i must learn to trust and keep hold of your hand the questions come why, Lord, why? and then I must remember you know our comings and our goings the reasons are yours to know i cling to all i know trying desperately to place it all the tumultuous thoughts and emotions to be hurt or not to be hurt? offended, offensive...? my decision is to be defended using Christ alone as my defense my heart may be wounded words, actions, deeds be the swords tip yet i will not waver i will not fall i place my well-being in your hand fear, torment, worry have no place in my heart the guilt, the blame, the condemnation satan is angered though it may be thrown my way, i refuse to let it stay as the duck QUACK QUACK and it rolls off it's back so be the fiery darts of the enemy drowning, spiraling down in the current i feel i can't break through i reach, i grasp, hurriedly hoping its all a bad dream calm, peace, serenity.... words flying incomprehensible through my head the tornado grows, the winds blow.... the rain begins, hard, angry, huge drops flood my soul beating away the hurt, the pain then lightly now, slacking ever so slightly, a smooth wisping sprinkle like fresh dew on the rose I feel the gentle drops carrying away all that should be gone refreshing, cold the smell of spring showers i feel the life stirring deep within, my heart is healing not worried, but at peace surprised at the change the storm can bring i awake, i smile. i dance, i pause. You alone, Jesus, are my salvation. You bring me peace no man can bring. Your word is wise, your patience longsuffering. You do not condemn. You speak life. You bring all that is good into my life. Your grace, your mercy - Always steady and unchanging. Washed away, in the sea of forgetfulness, all my torment, my pain - I thank you, i praise you. You alone are worthy My Lord My Savior My Christ My King..... But most of all, MY FRIEND

Food For Thought

I was reading a christian novel last night, and in doing so, the Lord opened my eyes to something I have been too blind to see. I do not have the book with me, so I am very much so going to paraphrase here. I hope it gets the point across. In this novel, a man was trying to comfort a friend who was faced with some difficult decisions. He began to tell her of a story his father used many times in sermons in days gone by..... There was this older fisherman who found himself alone out on the rough seas as a storm began to settle in. His small fishing boat was soon capsized by the overbearing waves, and the fisherman thought he'd surely perish. Much to his amazement, the Lord had it be that his boat capsized near an old and rusty buoy. The fisherman gave every ounce of determination he could muster fighting the waves to grab a hold of the old rusty thing. He climbed up on the buoy and held fast, praying and thanking the Lord that he'd not drowned. As he clung to the buoy for dear life, tossed to and fro in the tumultuous waves, the old man prayed that the Lord would spare his life. Minutes seemed like hours, and it wasn't too terribly long that another small craft happened by the buoy carrying a younger fisherman. The second threw the old man a rope and begged him to take hold so he could pull him to safety and get him to land.... time and time again the younger fisherman threw out a lifeline, begging the old man to let go of the buoy and come to the safety of the boat. The old man, out of fear, clung fast to the rusted buoy... He refused to loosen his grip for fear he'd be tossed under and swallowed up by the sea. The younger fisherman, heart wrought with despair, had no choice but to head inland before his craft be taken by the sea, thus leaving the old man to die, cold and alone in the midst of the storm. How many times do we, as Christians, hold on tight to all that is before us, praying God 'spare our lives', and when he happens by to send a lifeline REFUSE TO LET GO of the rusted old buoy and be pulled to safety? Lord, please, teach me to not hold on to the things I would believe to be my safety and life. Let me always be open to YOUR WAY, for you alone know my life's needs. I don't want to drown in the sea of storms because I try to work my life out on my own terms. Lead my life, Lord, in every way. I desire whole-heartedly YOUR WILL be done, on earth as it is in Heaven. Thank you for your mercy and grace, Lord. I bless your name, Jesus. Amen.